My story

For a long time, my inner voice was my harshest critic. I identified as a people-pleaser who believed I had to fix myself to be acceptable. From the outside, things looked great. I was an immigrant who had “made it.” I’d created a beautiful life, and was building a successful career, with the man who is now my husband (and baby daddy ♡) by my side. On the inside, however, the running commentary rarely stopped.

I tried a lot: therapy, books, podcasts, years of searching for the insight that would help me feel better. What finally shifted things was surprisingly simple. It began with a decision: to start treating myself the way I'd treat someone I love, and treating my life, my relationship, my work, and my hardest moments as places to learn, rather than proof that I wasn't enough.

As a scientist, I wanted to understand why that worked. The more I learned, the clearer it became: we don't grow under threat. We grow where we feel safe enough to look honestly at ourselves. That's what I now call self-warmth.